A Tale of Two Brides

Introduction

In our last lesson, we heard God prophesy to Rebekah that it would be the younger son, Jacob, through whom the covenant blessings would flow. After that, just look at all of the deceiving that went on: (1) Jacob tricked Esau into selling his birthright; (2) even though Isaac knew of God’s prophecy, he tried to override His purposes by secretly bestowing the blessing on Esau anyway; (2) Rebekah overheard Isaac’s secret plan and developed a secret plan of her own; (3) using an elaborate disguise, Jacob posed as Esau in order to deceive his 130 year old, blind father into giving him the blessing, which he did.

God had said, “The covenant blessings will flow through Jacob.” But instead of just letting God take care of it, Isaac and his family went to extraordinary lengths to get their own way. And even after all of the deceiving, lying, secret plan making, hard feelings and threats, you know what? Things turned out exactly like God said they would in the first place.

But there was more to come. Rebekah knew Esau had threatened Jacob’s life, so she encouraged Jacob to go to Mesopotamia, specifically to Haran, where her brother Laban lived. She said it would be just for “a few days”, until Esau cooled off and forgot he wanted to kill Jacob. Notice she said nothing to Jacob about looking for a wife while he was there (Genesis 27:43-45).

However, she said something to Isaac like,“Say, wouldn’t it be a good idea to send Jacob to Laban so he can find a wife there, and not take a wife from among the Canaanites like Esau did. I just can’t stand those girls!” Well, I added the last part, but I know that’s what she was thinking. The important thing is that Rebekah did not say anything to Isaac about Esau planning to kill Jacob, just like she didn’t say anything to Jacob about looking for a wife among Laban’s people. Once you invite deceit into your home as a guest, it’s really hard to get rid of it.

Think About This: Let’s look at again at how Abraham sought the perfect wife for Isaac. (1) Abraham sent his most trusted servant on a mission to find the appropriate woman for Isaac; (2) he insisted the servant go to Mesopotamia, Abraham’s homeland, to seek a wife; (3) he forbade the servant to select a Canaanite woman; (4) Abraham told the servant to absolutely never allow Isaac to leave the land of promise; and, (5) the servant was required to swear to these conditions (Genesis 24:1-9). Isaac did none of these things for Jacob. Jacob had deceived his father and his brother, resulting in a death threat from Esau, and he was fleeing for his life. It was Jacob’s circumstances, not his faith nor obedience, that forced him away from Beersheba and into Mesopotamia where he obtained his wives. If God had not compelled Jacob to leave Mesopotamia, would he have remained there? Many commentators believe Jacob would have stayed on indefinitely, away from the land of promise. (Deffinbaugh)

Jacob’s Dream

So Jacob left his home in Beersheba and came to Bethel where he spent the night. We are told that he took a stone and used it as a pillow. During the night, Jacob had a dream in which he saw angels going up and down a ladder that reached from the earth into heaven and at the top of the ladder, standing in heaven, was God. 

God revealed Himself to Jacob and reaffirmed the covenant he had made with Abraham and Isaac: that their descendants would be too numerous to count, and that the land would belong to them. God also gave this blessing to Jacob: “And behold, I am with you, and will keep you, wherever you go, and will bring you back to this land; for I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised you” (Genesis 28:15). 

But based on what Jacob said upon waking, it seems that he had some real trust issues. He said, “If God will be with me and will keep me on this journey that I take, and will give me food to eat and garments to wear, and I return to my father’s house in safety, then the Lord will be my God.” (Genesis 28:20-21). Not only did Jacob reveal some trust issues, but he also showed that he really didn’t know that much about God.

Think About This: Jacob also said, “Surely the Lord is in this place, and I did not know it” (Genesis 28:16). He did not understand that God is omnipresent, nor did he know that God cannot lie. When God says, “I will be with you”, then He is with you. It makes me wonder why Jacob did not know these things. Did Isaac, his father, fail to teach him  these things about God? In his younger years, Isaac displayed his faith in and knowledge of God, especially when he was nearly sacrificed on Mount Moriah. But did he fail to pass that reverence and knowledge on to his sons?

It’s possible that Jacob himself was such a scheming scoundrel, he just assumed everyone else was too, perhaps even including God. But God wasn’t finished with Jacob yet; his faith was still very immature. However, in the years ahead, he would come to know that even if all others were unreliable, God’s word was always good.

Meeting at the Well

Eventually Jacob arrived in Haran around mid-day; he saw a well in a field and he stopped there. Shepherds with three flocks of sheep were gathered around, presumably to water the sheep but as yet, no one had removed the large stone that covered the well. Jacob was apparently the first to speak, and he asked the shepherds if they knew Laban, son of Nahor. They answered and said they knew Laban and, oh by the way, here comes his daughter Rachel with her flock of sheep.

Even though this attractive girl was approaching, Jacob could not help but to ask the obvious question, saying something like,“You are here to water your sheep; why don’t you just water them and get on with your day?”  He was essentially saying, “Stop wasting time and get those sheep watered!”

According to Bob Deffinbaugh, this was no self-service well. It was customary for all of the flocks to gather, and then the owner of the well would send a servant to uncover it. This allowed the shepherds to water their sheep, and then they had to pay the servant for the water they used. “This story tells us a great deal about Jacob. But Jacob didn’t care about the rules. He did not care how things were supposed to be done. If something did not make sense to him, or if it was inconvenient, Jacob willfully bypassed the rules.”

And in true Jacob-fashion, he opened the well for Rachel and watered her sheep. This is quite a contrast to the events Abraham’s servant experienced, when the girl at the well served him. And when Jacob introduced himself to Rachel, she ran home to tell her father.

Meeting Uncle Laban

Jacob had reached his destination at last. When Rachel took Jacob home to meet her father, Jacob told him all that had happened, and upon hearing Jacob’s tales, Laban said, “Surely you are my flesh and my bone!” Maybe he just recognized something in Jacob, like his tendency to scheme, deceive, lie, bargain and exploit. It takes one to know one, I guess. And if Jacob thought he was the ultimate con-man, he had yet to see Uncle Laban in action.

Jacob stayed with the family for about a month; he would have seen Rachel every day and he decided he wanted to marry her. He apparently did not have a “real” job, although I imagine he was helping with chores around the farm, because one day, Laban said something like, “I don’t want you to work for me for nothing; name your wages.” 

We now read something we did not know before: Laban had two daughters. Leah was the older of the two, and she was, well, plain looking. The younger sister was beautiful Rachel. Jacob struck a bargain to work for seven years if he was granted permission to marry Rachel, and Laban agreed to the terms. After seven years, the wedding day arrived; there was a celebration and a feast and consummation of the marriage.

Okay, so you know what’s coming and I have a problem with it. Are we really meant to believe that Jacob did not know he had just consummated a marriage to the wrong woman? How can that even happen? But we do know that Scripture never lies so we need to keep an open mind and try to consider some possible explanations: 

(1) Maybe it was too dark for Jacob to see Leah’s face, or maybe he wasn’t really looking at her face anyway. Maybe Leah and Rachel were about the same size, and remember, in those days, the engaged couple really didn’t get to know one another until after they were legally married.

(2) Leah would probably have had a heavy and ornate bridal veil that completely covered her face. 

(3) It was a wedding, after all. Maybe Jacob had had a little too much to drink and that affected his perception.

(4) Was Leah aware of the deception and did she disguise her voice on purpose, in an attempt to deceive Jacob? (Remember Jacob was guilty of using that same deception on his father.) But whether or not she was aware of her father’s plan, she must surely have felt sadness and shame when Jacob reacted the way he did, making it clear that he wanted Rachel, not her.

Laban insisted that Jacob work an additional seven years for Rachel, although Jacob did not have to wait for seven years to consummate that marriage. And so, no matter how it happened, it actually did happen. Jacob, the deceiver, had himself been deceived, and he didn’t like it. But he eventually got the better of Laban, and that will be the subject of our next lesson.

Think About It, Talk About It

What happens to us when we employ deceit in order to get something we want? How might God punish that kind of behavior? 

How do you think Abraham’s parenting style compared with the way in which Isaac raised his sons? What impact did those differences have on Isaac’s sons?

What do you think we are meant to learn from Jacob’s dream about the ladder reaching into heaven? What was the significance of God standing at the top of the ladder?

Sources

Deffinbaugh, Bob: Jacob, from the series From Creation to the Cross (www.bible.org)

How could Jacob Not Notice He Married Leah Instead of Rachel? (www.gotquestions.org)

Hughes, R. Kent: Preaching the Word-Genesis (Crossway Books)

MacArthur, John: Genesis 12-33, The Father of Israel (MacArthur Bible Studies, Thomas Nelson Publishers, 2008)

McGee, J. Vernon: Thru the Bible with J. Vernon McGee (Thomas Nelson, Inc. Publishers)